


Gaucherie

by Tenshifos



Category: A3! (Video Game)
Genre: M/M, this is just (rather vanilla) porn yeehaw, this is set in act 3 of the main story so banju are 19
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-16
Updated: 2020-08-16
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:33:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,674
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25934461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tenshifos/pseuds/Tenshifos
Summary: Juza walks in on Banri jerking off. Things escalate greatly from there via competition, as is the norm for these two idiots.
Relationships: Hyoudou Juuza/Settsu Banri
Comments: 15
Kudos: 208





	Gaucherie

Hyodo’s going to be out for a few days. It’s nothing serious or anything, he and his brother are simply spending a weekend at home after living in the dorms for so long. Autumn’s last show just ended, thus both the brothers are free from responsibility and can afford to take a few days off to spend some time with their family. Or something like that.

Whatever the reason, Banri’s fucking thrilled about it. While they’ve known and lived with each other for a few years now, it doesn’t change the fact that Hyodo’s an awful roommate. He snores, he’s unfairly ripped, he leaves laundry and/or candy wrappers all over the place, and just generally pisses Banri off by existing for a variety of reasons, thus a small respite from his presence is more than welcome. He can sit on the couch in very little clothing and game in silence, and no one but the TV screen he has set up can judge him for it.

That’s, in essence, what he does for the whole weekend. Sometimes he moves up to his bed, and sometimes he moves to Itaru’s room, but the gaming itself never changes. Amazing what you can accomplish when your stupid roommate isn’t breathing down your neck about his homework or whatever the fuck. His backlog of games decreases exponentially over the weekend.

The other thing he does is jerk off, obviously. Banri’s a healthy 19 year old who has to share a living space with another person, he’s gotta take any opportunity he can to relieve some of his frustrations. He could easily go pick up a cute girl, but he can still do that when Hyodo is here and doesn’t want to cut into his room time, so he ends up with his hand on his dick every night. Some of his game backlog were ero games anyway, so it’s like two birds with one stone, right?

It’s Sunday night, and he’s in the middle of one of said games, slumped onto the couch in nothing but his boxers and a blanket to cover himself with in an emergency (most people knock, but he’s not risking it). He’s chosen the cute, busty sports girl for this particular run, and the CG was so easy to unlock and is _great_ material. Banri’s hand is down his shorts before the scene’s even done, and he’s stroked himself to full hardness in no time. While he could easily read and jerk off at the same time, he doesn’t really want to, so he abandons the reading part entirely and skips through the rest of the scene. He’ll leave the CG up without the dialogue in the way, though.

Banri shifts to get a better angle, sliding his other hand up his chest to gently play with a nipple. He’s content like that for a little, letting his soft moans get drowned out by the game’s OST so none of his neighbours accidentally hear. This is probably his last session for a while, since Hyodo’s coming back in the morning, so he’s drawing it out. He’ll never stroke exactly fast or hard enough to be perfectly satisfying, never let his thumb linger on that sweet spot for too long. His head lolls to the side in pleasure, and something peeking out between the couch cushions catches his eye. 

There’s a moment of hesitation before he hastily retrieves it, and yeah, it’s lube. That sets off a lot of very complicated thoughts in Banri, most of which are ‘Hyodo touching himself’ that quickly get stamped down so his boner doesn’t go away. He’ll think about why it’s here after he’s done. What remains is… curiosity, Banri guesses? 

If he’s not going to get to jerk off again for some time, might as well try something new... If it’s not bad, he’s not totally opposed to being pegged. Or being with a guy, for that matter, as long as it’s not Hyodo.

He can use as much of Hyodo’s lube as he wants, because confronting Banri about it would involve the impossible task of admitting it was there in the first place. A generous amount is poured onto his fingers, and he warms it up before reaching down and tracing his ass. When that feels… kinda good actually, he bites the bullet and puts his entire middle finger inside, and _oh,_ he has to stifle the louder moan he makes. It’s a little uncomfortable still, but the pleasure that comes when he moves it far outweighs any of that. Damn, no wonder people do this. 

His cock is leaking in seconds, and he’s tossing his boxers off and out of the way so he can spread his legs far enough apart to easily get a second, then a third finger in. It’s getting harder and harder to force himself to make it last, he’s so close, he just wants to wrap a hand around himself and finish the job…

And of course, that’s the moment Hyodo decides to slip into their room, closing the door behind him. 

“‘m home-” He stops dead in his tracks. 

Banri panics, and it takes him a moment of fumbling to wrap himself up in his safety blanket. “Y-Y-You could fuckin’ knock, asshole!” Is all he manages to say. He’s still very much processing that oh no, Hyodo has seen all the most intimate parts of him now.

“...I-It’s my room too, I don’t gotta knock-” His roommate cannot make eye contact with him, and he’s examining a part of the ceiling. The room is barely lit, the ceiling lights aren’t on, and yet somehow Banri can still see him blushing. 

There’s awkward silence. Banri can’t really go anywhere; he’s naked and his hand is still covered in lube, and Hyodo makes no motion to do anything but lock the door behind him. The room is only gently lit by the glow of... his big tiddy naked anime girl CG. Great. Another tick on his growing list of ‘reasons to just die’. He shuts the TV off with the remote, at least Hyodo can’t see his face in the dark.

“...You’re back early,” Banri mumbles, in a half-assed attempt to save himself from this actual living hell.

“Wanted to sleep here. Easier to get to classes from the dorms…” Hyodo is still inspecting the ceiling in the dark, and Banri’s sure both he and his roommate are wishing he’d decided to stay at home.

“...Right. You wanna fuckin’ leave for a sec?”

“Why, so you can f-finish?”

“S-So I can change, asshole!” His cock is still hard, though, he’d much rather finish jerking off.

“No! There’re people out there, I don’t really wanna explain why ‘m standin’ outside my own damn room-” Hyodo’s gaze has moved from the ceiling to the floor, anywhere but acknowledging Banri’s existence.

“T-The hell do you want me to do, then? Just sit here?”

“...J-Just finish.”

“H-Hah?!”

“I-I’ll close my eyes, so j-just finish.”

Banri stares back at him in disbelief, and it takes him a moment to process. If his acting prestige has ruined anything for him, it’s that he can _feel_ deep down in his soul where a show would have a break in the dialogue to let the audience react to that shocking revelation.

“That’s- That’s not how-” He can barely form sentences, it’s kind of pathetic. “I-I can’t get it goin’ with you in the fuckin’ room, do you have any idea how sex works?”

“O-Of course I do,” Hyodo sputters, unconvincingly.

“Yeah right. No way you could ever get anyone off. G-Get out.”

Hyodo considers this for a moment, his expression furrowing, and Banri can see the cogs turning in his roommate’s head.

“...I’ll finish you, then.”

A beat.

Another beat.

_Ding._

“I- ...Wh-What the fuck-?!” Words have failed him, how is he supposed to respond to something like that? 

“I-It solves this, and I can prove to you I could… g-get someone off.” Banri’s doubtful, since Hyodo can barely say the sentence ‘get someone off’ without his voice cracking, but his expression is firm. 

Ugh, why does their competitive streak have to extend to something like this. Banri can’t turn down a challenge.

“...Y-Y’know what, fine. Just ‘cause I bet you can’t, and you’re gonna buy me an extra large maki roll bento when you lose, Hyodo.” He just wants out of this hell scenario, and maybe watching Hyodo pathetically try to fumble his way through sex _and_ kicking his ass at something will cheer him up.

“Fine. You’re gonna get me a shortcake when I can, Settsu.” Banri instinctively curls further up in his blanket when Hyodo sits next to him on the couch.

“C-Can’t wait to eat my bento. Gonna taste so good, fueled by beatin’ you.”

“Uhuh.” Hyodo is… Taking his shirt off, right, that’s what they’re doing. Banri takes a moment to trail his gaze over Hyodo’s body, not for any other reason than the fact that he can appreciate some nice muscles, before he’s snapped back into reality by his roommate pulling his emergency blanket off. It’s tossed away, leaving him fully exposed, and he’s definitely still hard and Hyodo can definitely see it. Banri’s back is leaning against the arm of the couch, there’s nowhere to escape to, so he just has to endure it as Hyodo crawls almost on top of him.

...This is happening, so Banri grabs a bicep to squeeze appreciatively. They’re firm under his grip, and Hyodo takes that as permission to start pressing soft kisses down his neck. His head instinctively leans out of the way, giving him more room.

“N-No marks.” Banri whines, and he’s a little mad that some dumb chaste kisses are making him let out such desperate noises.

“Mm,” Hyodo replies in confirmation, his lips still pressed against the junction between Banri’s neck and shoulder. Hands trails down his body, stopping to squeeze at his chest, and Banri can’t help but moan softly as his roommate starts thumbing his nipples. 

There’s another kiss, this one closer to Banri’s ear. “That feels good, Settsu...?” 

“Sh-Shut up,” he spits back, and arches into the touch. Hyodo frowns against his neck, and he shivers a little. It’s sensitive.

“Gimme real feedback, ‘s unfair if you don’t tell me what you like.”

“Fine… Feels good,” he admits, and Hyodo kisses further down his torso to start gently sucking on a bud instead. Banri’s hands go up to tangle in his hair, messing up his stupid gelled style, and by time Hyodo moves to the other side of his chest his bangs have fallen onto his face completely. 

It’s getting harder for Banri to hold his voice back, but that doesn’t mean Hyodo’s any good. Anyone can play with his nipples and get this reaction out of him, it’s not special... He’ll keep telling himself that as his roommate kisses down his body, seeming to get less and less confident as he gets closer to sitting between Banri’s legs.  
  
Hyodo does stop between his thighs, and seems to be... avoiding his dick, kissing and biting softly at his anything but it instead. It’s not horrible, but...  
  
“It ain’t gonna bite, asshole, just touch me already.” Hyodo’s face peers up from between his legs, and the eye contact they make is excruciatingly painful with his roommate’s face so uncomfortably (?) close to his dick.

“D-Don’t rush me. You ever heard of foreplay?”

“Foreplay doesn’t fuckin’ count if I was already hard when you walked in. Touch it.”  
  
Hyodo considers this, and there’s another awkward moment while he just... stares at it. Banri can’t even begin to guess what’s going through his stupid head, if anything at all, but he’s definitely not expecting Hyodo to lean in and wrap his lips around the tip. Holy shit. Banri’s hands immediately fly back into his hair as he bobs his head, biting his bottom lip to muffle himself. It’s messy and pretty bad; Banri can definitely tell he’s never done it before, but... pressure on his dick is pressure on his dick, despite it being the worst blowjob he’s ever gotten. He has no idea how to breathe and keep a rhythm going at the same time, but fuck if acting on enthusiasm alone isn’t doing something for him.

There’s a soft choking noise as Hyodo takes him further, and Banri rolls his eyes despite the arousal. Stupid eager idiot, taking too much at once. He uses his grip on Hyodo’s hair to pull him up off his dick, and he _moans_. Oh, that sure is a piece of information about his roommate he would’ve been happy to die without knowing, but he files it away in his brain anyway to bully him about later.

Neither of them can look each other in the eyes, but that doesn’t stop Hyodo from quickly unfastening his pants and kicking them off. Okay, so they’re not going to talk about that right away, and all Hyodo does is crawl back on top of him and continue kissing at his neck.  
  
“Bed?” He mumbles after a minute, softly nibbling at Banri’s earlobe.

“Sure. Get off.” Hyodo complies, and they do the awkward shuffle both to and up the ladder of Banri’s bed. He’d never considered it until just now, but loft beds are awkward as hell for sex. 

He moves to lay down, but Hyodo stops him and lays down first, motioning for Banri to straddle his hips. So he does, settling on his thighs. He can definitely see Hyodo’s hard-on through his underwear at this angle, and while he knew it was big already (by accident, okay, he was coming out of the bath) it seems to be even bigger hard...  
  
He swallows. It’s just a dick, don’t think about it. 

Hyodo’s hands roam up his body, stopping on his shoulders so he can gently tug Banri down. As soon as he’s close enough, Hyodo leans up and kisses him softly, and it’s not the worst, at least not compared to his sorry excuse of a blowjob from earlier. Normally just the thought of kissing Hyodo would have him running out of the room, but... Hyodo’s about to do way worse than just kissing so he might as well enjoy it. He takes the initiative to deepen it, and Hyodo eagerly opens his mouth to let his tongue in. His hands eventually snap down to Banri’s ass and squeeze hard, and he moans just as enthusiastically into his mouth. 

He got taken by surprise, okay. That doesn’t explain why he’s grinding back against Hyodo’s hands as they play with it, but that’s the excuse he’s going with.

“G-Gonna fuck you,” Hyodo mumbles quietly against his lips between kisses, and any sort of angry retort Banri had is interrupted by a moan that was definitely too loud as Hyodo traces a finger along his hole. He’s still stretched enough from earlier that he can slip the tip in, and it’s embarrassing how easily he reacts. 

“Better be good or I’m never gonna let you live it down- Nhh~” Hyodo’s entire finger slides into him, and it takes every bit of willpower he has to not start moving his hips when the finger remains static. Frustratingly, Hyodo’s fingers are bigger than his, so just one fills him up pretty nicely…

His gaze flicks back downwards. Is that thing even going to fit? Guess they’ll find out.

Hyodo’s got the lube suddenly, he must’ve grabbed it on their way up, and he’s withdrawing his finger just long enough to pour more of it on his hand. If Banri thought one finger was a lot, two is stretching him open so much, and thank god Hyodo actually moves them this time. All he can do is grip the sheets next to his roommate’s head and force his voice quieter.

“You look like you’re havin’ fun,” Hyodo comments, and his gaze is travelling up and down Banri’s body. Yeah, he knows he’s hot, but there’s something different about it when Hyodo’s doing it.

“F-Fuck you,” he replies, and that’s all he can really get out. Hyodo’s fingers are so deep inside him, it’s so unfair… But he hasn’t lost yet. Despite how it feels, if he can’t make Banri come, it’s still his win.

He gets slowly stretched out, and Hyodo is making this frustrated expression as he scissors his fingers inside him. Hah, dumbass can’t find his prostate… is what he would say out loud if his voice wasn’t distracted. It’s fucking good, evidenced by the fact that Banri can’t really form coherent sentences, but he’s not going to come anytime soon. He’s just gotta keep telling himself that.

Hyodo’s pulling his cock out, finally, and Banri has to bite his lip when he glances down. Yeah, it’s huge. So what. How badly he wants that filling him up as soon as possible means nothing.

“Sit on it…?” Hyodo’s voice asks, and he (very tragically) slides his fingers out of him. Shit, he was caught staring. He wants to, but...

“...No. If I ride you, I’m doin’ all the work.” Hyodo frowns, and Banri has to stop himself from saying ‘next time’. Hell fucking no there’s not gonna be a next time, because Hyodo’s gonna be an awful fuck and he’s going to get his sushi and they’re never going to talk about this again.

“‘Kay. Then lay down.” 

Banri laughs. “What, you’re really gonna do me missionary? Can’t believe my expectations just got lower.”

Instead of snapping back, Hyodo quietly shifts his gaze to the side. “I-I want to see your face. Feels weird if I can’t.”

Banri’s face heats up just a little. Embarrassing. 

“Gross. But fine.” He complies, laying down and bracing himself for what’s about to happen. He’s waiting, exposed, yet Hyodo’s crawling over the partition to his own bed for some reason.

“Where the hell are you goin’?”

“C-Condom.” He stutters, and sure enough he retrieves a packet from under his mattress. Banri has a thousand more questions that he’s not sure he wants answers to, but Hyodo’s moving back over and between his legs, crawling over him again. It should be the same as earlier, but this time the anticipation makes it feel way different. He swallows, thickly.

“Legs up,” Hyodo says, his voice cracking again, as he tears the packet open with his teeth and rolls the condom on. Banri almost laughs to hide his own embarrassment at the situation. He does wrap his legs around his roommate’s waist, though. God, this is such a compromising position, but there’s no going back now.

He can’t hold back a gasp as Hyodo’s cock touches his ass. He’s really putting that thing in, huh…?

“R-Ready?”

“Just hurry up, dumbass-” He’s shaking slightly in fear. Yep, just fear. Hyodo has a bit of a concerned look on his face, but he bites his lip in concentration and starts to slide in anyway, and _oh._

God, it’s big. It does kind of hurt, but other than that he feels _so full_. It’s kind of unfair how good it feels, actually, when Hyodo’s so obviously inexperienced. 

“F-Fuck,” he hisses, he can’t help it. The concern in his roommate’s eyes grows.

“Hurts too much? Should I stop?”

“No-” he says, way too loud and too quickly for someone who’s supposed to be disinterested. “No, ‘s fine, keep goin’-”

Hyodo nods, and continues to slide in. Fuck, he’s neverending, it feels like it’s been hours when he finally bottoms out. Banri’s wrecked already, but at least he has the satisfaction of knowing Hyodo’s just as bad off by the expression on his face. 

“T-Tight,” he moans, and his fingertips are digging into Banri’s hips. “G-Good for you too…?”

“Ghh,” Is Banri’s only reply, along with a small nod, because he’s way too stubborn to voice his approval. He’s not sure where to put his hands, so he bunches them up in the sheets. They don’t stay there for long, though, because as soon as Hyodo starts fucking him they fly up to grip his shoulders, and he gets a very nice groan in response when he digs his nails into them.

“You... You like pain?” Banri asks, because nothing can be more embarrassing than the sound of Hyodo’s hips slapping against his ass.

“Fuck you,” Hyodo responds. That’s a yes in Banri’s book, and even when he’s getting fucked he’s still a bastard, so he claws down Hyodo’s back as hard as he can. That was the right choice, as it both gets a rise out of Hyodo and gets him to fuck Banri harder.

Of course, when his head flies back from the harder pace, Hyodo takes the opportunity to bite at his collarbone in retaliation. He did say no marks, but when Hyodo leaves an obvious bite mark on his collarbone, where his clothes hide it, well… he moans too loudly to be too mad about it.

“G-Gonna come-?” Hyodo asks, but it’s mumbled against his neck.

“W-Why don’t you try harder and make me?” He retorts, but there’s definitely already pressure building in his lower half. He was expecting Hyodo to be as awful and clumsy as that blowjob was earlier, but he’s drilling into Banri at a hard, steady pace that’s definitely dragging him closer to the edge. Fuck.

His fate is sealed when Hyodo reaches down and starts stroking him too. It’s not in time, but it’s enough, and combined with how full he feels-

“Now?” Hyodo asks, and there’s a hint of smugness in his voice. He can’t really word a reply, all he can do is moan incoherently and continue to claw at Hyodo’s back. 

“H-Hyodo- _Juza-_!” Hyodo’s first name escapes his lips as he tips onto the edge, and his cock hits Banri’s prostate an embarrassing total of one whole time before he comes, _hard_ , all over both of their stomachs. He fades in and out of consciousness for a few moments, just vaguely aware of Hyodo still pounding into him, then probably coming himself with a groan a second later.

Maybe if he could just fall asleep, he could pretend nothing happened, but he’s too hopped up on adrenaline still. He can vaguely hear and feel Hyodo moving around, sliding out of him and pulling Banri into his arms.

Wait.

“Ugh, lemme go… Didn’t sign up for cuddling.”

“Shh, asshole. Just let me have this.”

Banri’s too boneless to shove him off, so he begrudgingly hugs Hyodo back. At least he’s warm.

There’s a beat of silence, where all Banri can hear is his own breathing and Hyodo’s heartbeat racing. It’s… kind of nice, actually, so obviously it’s ruined right away.

“I win.”

“Fuck you,” he grumbles back, because yep. Hyodo wins.

“...It was good?” He asks, and it’s a lot more hesitant than he was just a second ago.

“...I came. No further comments.” He grumbles into Hyodo’s chest.

“Good enough. When do I get my cake?” He asks, cutely, and he’s blaming the fact that he could ever think anything about Hyodo is cute on the many hormones running through his system right now.

“Tomorrow. ‘m going to sleep.”

“‘Kay,” Hyodo mumbles, and cuddles him closer.

He’s way too deflated to complain, and their door is locked so there’s no chance of this being walked in on… He accepts his fate, and passes out surprisingly easy in his roommate’s arms.

\---

Banri doesn’t have Monday lecture, so he’s only vaguely aware when Hyodo’s alarm goes off and he leaves for classes, because the bed is cold. He falls right back asleep, and doesn’t crawl out of bed until just after noon.

He’s… embarrassingly sore, but he’s not limping or anything, so he heads to take a shower and get dressed. He figures it’s just easier if he goes to the convenience store by himself. That way, he can get Hyodo’s cake and then they can pretend all of this never happened. Plus, he can pick up some snacks for himself. 

The clerk at the store asks him if he’s buying a cake for his girlfriend, and while he adamantly denies it on the outside, inside he’s burning with embarrassment.

Once he gets home, Banri copes by spending the rest of the day curled up on the couch, angrily shoving chips into his mouth. He doesn’t even hear Hyodo come home this time, he’s too focused on trying to burn a hole into the wall with his mind.

“Settsu? I’m… I ain’t sure if this is more or less weird than walkin’ in on you jerkin’ off.” Banri jolts, and quickly sits up straight.

“Fuck off, I didn’t sleep well. There’s your cake.” Lie, he slept the best he has in a long time, but Hyodo gets too excited about the sweets to call him out on it.

“Thanks. You got the kind I liked?” He plants himself on the couch, right next to Banri. 

“...Y-You’ve been my roommate for two years, now. You notice after a while.”

“Mghfm,” is Hyodo’s reply, but it’s entirely incomprehensible because of the cake in his mouth. Cute, his brain thinks without his permission, and now he doesn’t even have hormones to blame it on. Gross.

The cake is demolished in seconds while Banri picks at his nails, and once the packaging is disposed of, Hyodo shifts and gently presses their shoulders together.

“Are we, uh. Gonna talk about last night, Settsu?”

“Talk about what? Nothin’ happened.” Please don’t do this to him, Hyodo.

“...Really? Nothin’?”

“Nothin’,” he repeats, firmly. He gets a frown in his direction.

“You really don’t have anythin’ to say?”

“What, do you?”

“Yeah, I do. I wanna do it again,” Hyodo says, with all the seriousness in the world on his face. Banri nearly chokes on his chips. 

God, why is this bastard so honest? He’s stuck staring at Hyodo dead-eyed for a beat too long.

“I-I’m not bein’ your fuckin’ boyfriend.”

“That’s fine, that’s not what I’m askin’. We can just be… roommates with benefits?” He says it with a small hint of uncertainty, like he googled the term on the way home, and Banri can’t help but snort in response. Dumbass.

“What, liked it so much you can’t help but come crawlin’ back?”

“Do I gotta remind you that I won, Settsu? You liked it just as much as I did.” Banri has no verbal response that isn’t honestly admitting he did, so he just punches Hyodo in the shoulder, and he gets an elbow to his side back.

“...Why? You just want someone to fuck?”

“...A little.” There’s a look on Hyodo’s face that suggests that’s not the full story, but he doesn’t really care to push it right now. 

As embarrassing as it is… Maybe Banri’s fine with just fucking. Sex is sex.

“...Fine. We can do it again. But I can’t stress enough that I ain’t your fuckin’ boyfriend, so you’re not allowed to get mad if I date someone.”

“Obviously,” Hyodo says, and reaches over to steal some of his chips. He doesn’t care enough to smack him away, he’ll just go buy another bag later. “One last thing?”

“What is it.”

“Banri,” Hyodo says, and Banri makes a face. Ugh, his whole body gets warm and it’s disgusting. Absolutely horrible that Hyodo can come home and ruin his entire day in about five minutes. At least the sex is good.

“D-Don’t. Absolutely not.”

“You said my name last night, just returnin’ the favour.” There’s the smallest hint of a grin on his face, and it pisses Banri off, so he leans in and presses a kiss to Hyodo’s lips. When he pulls away Hyodo is red, and making the same shocked face Banri was, and he feels so satisfyingly smug.

“Mm, I kinda like this whole arrangement, actually. I got so many new ways to make you shut the fuck up.”

“It goes both ways, asshole,” Hyodo responds, and pulls Banri in for a kiss.

He’s compelled to kiss back, for some reason.

**Author's Note:**

> Gaucherie (french) - awkward, embarrassing, or unsophisticated  
> i'm going to write more of this eventually but ive hit my yearly fic posting quota so. i just couldn't stop thinking about juza walking in on him so that's why this thing exists  
> follow me on twit @tenshifos


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